RichHL feed I'm in love with my wife. And I really can't be arsed with optimists, optimisers or porn. Unless it's really good porn.
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1 #100factsaboutme 49 I don’t know how to pronounce ‘cheese.’
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1 #100factsaboutme 40 I have spent the night in Sir Tom Jones’ underwear. He didn’t notice
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1 #100factsaboutme 33 Some people call me the gangster of love and some people call me Maurice
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1 #100factsaboutme 31 Mine eyes have seen the glory of the coming of the Lord
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1 #100factsaboutme 30 I invented haggisburgers. They’re the original Big Macs
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1 #100factsaboutme 29 I used to open the batting for Essex but found opening the tuna for Tilly more rewarding
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1 #100factsaboutme 24 I’m a whore’s whisperer
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3 #100factsaboutme I have appeared in Keira Knightley’s worst nightmare. I was holding a frog
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1 #100factsaboutme 14 I have snogged Nicholas Sarkozy. His breath smelled faintly of Gauloise
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1 #100factsaboutme 13 I once got a Gorbals kiss from a squirrel
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2 #100factsaboutme 12 I know how to say ‘Please’ ‘Thank you’ and ‘All Englishmen are arseholes’ in all major European languages. And French
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1 #100factsaboutme 11 I have never said the word ‘eleven’ aloud in public
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3 The bots are back
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7 This ‘lots and lots of exercise’ diet is really doing the trick. I can eat like a horse and the pounds just fall off
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5 Her Indoors was watching a John Woo film. I only started paying attention when everything exploded
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3 Just added the sixth ladle of stock to the risotto. I think it’s nearly ready
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3 Computer news now: in a freaky parallel to a Terry Pratchett book, there appear to be ants in my laptop. #AntHillInside
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1 Bed time. Good night, all. You’re lovely
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1 @OberonBooks I had one of those innocent things and was sorely disappointed
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1 RT @samgrinsell: @Lnr42 #kitchensongs surely it’s Sieve And Then Fry ;) <= Much better. :-)