jimmyfallon feed I woke up one morning wearing my T-shirt as pants. One leg through the neck hole, one leg through a sleeve. #drunkestievergot
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@jimmyfallon #drunkestievergot is when I woke up the next day unaware of what city I was in and an empty bottle of jack in my bag.
@jimmyfallon Woke up in my neighbors yard with my pants around my ankles and I had pissed myself. Neighbor woke me. #drunkestievergot
@jimmyfallon #drunkestievergot woke up with a random guy half on my bed, someone in my bathroom and a naked chick in my dads bed.
@jimmyfallon shortly moving my bedroom to the other side of the hallway, mom caught me trying to pee in the linen cupboard #drunkestievergot
@jimmyfallon threw up in a box that a company exec's wife was holding... And not a company I worked for. #drunkestievergot
@jimmyfallon On my little cousins 21st birthday drank an extra large brandy cup full of a mixture of 21 liquors, (cont) http://www.twitlonger.com/show/9a3g2b
@jimmyfallon #drunkestievergot Got kicked out of club, threw up all over my cousins back, helped her pick vomit cherries out of her thong
@jimmyfallon cab driver took an hour to come get us, we yelled @ her & she called my BF's mom #drunkestievergot (legal @18 where I'm from)
@jimmyfallon went around parking lot unscrewing gas caps and throwing them in the ditch #drunkestievergot no wait! I was sober then OOPS
@jimmyfallon Just asked my husband for his #drunkestievergot &that was his answer!! He literally just looked around to see if you overheard.
@jimmyfallon Yo jimmy i have 0 followers can you help me out?
@jimmyfallon sounds like a rockin night!!
@jimmyfallon Woke n dark rm w/unfamiliar windows thanks Ashley 4not leaving me at the bar. #drunkestievergot
@jimmyfallon I once woke up naked with this girl next to me and I didn't even remember meeting her
@jimmyfallon #drunkestievergot when I woke up with a tattoo of a mushroom holding a sign that said tangerine. Fml
@jimmyfallon I once woke up on a tarp in my friends basement covered in my own various bodily fluids. Still hammered. #drunkestievergot
@jimmyfallon I woke up and I had cut my hair like Kim Jong Il #drunkestievergot
@jimmyfallon I entered a bathroom to find a guy taking a dump so I puked in the bathtub instead. He got mad. #drunkestievergot
@jimmyfallon
@jimmyfallon so woke up on a couch by myself, stumbled to the toilet, pulled down my pants to find my entire manhood covered in red lipstick
@jimmyfallon lipstick applied by tandem girls at the party in front of everyone. BTW, applied by HAND, not LIPS. Graffiti gone bad!
@jimmyfallon
@jimmyfallon walked down an icy driveway didnt fall, took off shoes picked them up fell and put my head through the wall #drunkestievergot
@jimmyfallon Hey Jimmy when will we see another Jersey Floor??? Patiently waiting :o)
@jimmyfallon @LoveToSupportJB @BieberOnReplay @harry_styles100 http://www.witbjbf.com/?id=MrsBiebs12
@jimmyfallon and where was the other sleeve.... Crude I know!
@jimmyfallon I actually did that same thing, my cousins closet was soaked. Oops #drunkestievergot #21stbirthday
@jimmyfallon the drunkest I ever got I ended up in a fight. With a tree. I won. #drunkestievergot
@jimmyfallon #drunkestievergot I drunk dialed 911 from Charlie Sheens house to report my suitcase stolen by a troll named Adonis.
@jimmyfallon Vampires+Apocalypse= Derision Book 1 on sale now at LuLu.com. Ebook only, download today